Warning Signs

THURSDAY, MAY 27, 2010


Warning Signs
Today I am gonna wing it. That, in and of itself, might be a warning sign. And I got up early. And I mean early.

What is it about Warning Signs? Could there ever be enough or too many Warning Signs? Did I tell you that I used to be a Sign Man?

I am not talking about only the ones in written text on the orange diamond backgrounds next to the road informing drivers that the bridge might ice if the temperature is too low. Or, even the ones printed on plastic bags so toddlers do not use the bags as toys.

Some warning signs also include the penalty for ignoring them like the Handicapped Parking Signs. The penalty should not have to be posted for potential offenders as $250 for ignoring them. Tow Zone signs usually include information about how to contact someone to retrieve the vehicle if it should not be there when the reprobate returns and the car has disappeared.

Many warning signs are nonverbal. There are the birds chirping at the crosswalks informing the non-sighted that it is or is not safe to enter the intersection. Maybe these warning signs are verbal and we just need to learn the language.

Apparently some of the warning signs of the economic disaster we are experiencing were not clear enough, soon enough. There were many of these signs. It was not just the banks and the government that did not speak the language.


DakotaDawg has her own set of nonverbal warning signs. I am beginning to recognize many of hers.

There is the one, the dog barking around the corner that lets DakotaDawg know it is time to awaken from her slumber and defend her property against invasion by the TerribleTriplets. These three Scottie Dogs pass with their owner usually about the same time every morning. As far as I know DakotaDawg is content to just wait for the warning of Sarge instead of continually checking every clock in the house. DakotaDawg has not yet learned to read time. Since I am learning the language I think that may be a verbal warning sign.

DakotaDawg is learning English. It is a case of an old dog learning new tricks. I attempted to purchase the world's #1 language-learning software, Rosetta Stone, for dogs but found none available for her. Instead we are taking it one small step at a time. I know DakotaDawg knows some Hochdeutsch since she responds to some commands in Hochdeutsch. She is not a German Sheppard. I am not sure where she learned this but we are working on helping her through her Bill Murray moment.

DakotaDawg has many of her own nonverbal warning signs that I and the kitties are becoming familiar with. One is that she is in charge. Often this is not true and the Force is greater with either the kitties or me.

When DakotaDawg takes up station in the “Kitty Control Area” we all pretty much understand that no kitty shall pass while she is stationed there. If it is not clear enough to the kitties DakotaDawg is willing to offer translation help with a gentle nip on the butt for all that do not understand.

The Cute Little Orange Talking Kitty does not believe in nonverbal warning signs and tells DakotaDawg and anyone else in earshot whatever it is that they need to be informed of. Often this applies to DakotaDawg taking up station. This is a case of whoever can yell the loudest getting their way.

I am about to send the Cute Little Orange Talking Kitty to congress to see if he can show them how it works. Teddy Roosevelt understood how all of that worked but he also carried a big stick in case the people he wanted to know something only spoke Hochdeutsch.


From what I am seeing on the news about gunk floating in the gulf it must be time to take out the Big Stick and use it.

Some states and politicians so gung ho about “Drill Baby; Drill” are having second thoughts. Hopefully they did not hear or see the warning signs too late.


“Could there ever be enough or too many Warning Signs?” is not a rhetorical question and it does have an answer: Apparently not.

I want to continue to hear the chirping of the birds. I do not want to be a non-sighted person. Hopefully the chirping will not only come from electronic devices and speakers attached to warning signs at intersections.
With “About 3,020,000 results (0.37 seconds)” Google and that many other people do think that Sarge is a word. MicroSoft, please remove the warning sign.

POSTED BY SRPLUS AT 5:50 AM 0 COMMENTS