Hopefully that thing you should never forget is something you want to remember!

TUESDAY, JUNE 29, 2010


Hopefully that thing you should never forget is something you want to remember!

Maybe this is not such simple reasoning.

The other side of the equation is things you don’t want to remember become the precise and countless things you can never forget. Despite my best efforts this happens instead of the other way around.

It is not so much that either of these are simple suppositions. The questions always remain: Will what I don’t want to remember or what I don’t want to forget become reality and somehow turn out to be what is stored in the memory banks? Possibly neither will happen. Provisions must be made for all scenarios.

Most of the things I should never forget are the exact things I find impossible to remember. They are the things that I really should remember and I suppose just don’t want to quite enough. Many are such little things, like where I put something. The real kicker here is that it is still exactly where I put it so I would remember where it was. I simply don’t know even though it is still safe where I put it.

I treat mail this way. My theory is that if I need something badly enough I will find it when I have to. If not; it really is not needed in the first place. So that I never fail to have something if I need it I have joined that special club that saves almost everything. Mail or otherwise. I have everything stuffed everywhere.

Mail; I don’t usually bother to read when it arrives. And, I don’t try too hard to sort the wheat from the chaff.

First Class mail goes in the “to save” pile. This usually is some pile somewhere. There might be a one in ten chance that I will look for it later or even will want or have to. Lots of this material is stuffed under the seats of my Land Cruiser, on the dashboard or in some box with more of the same. I pick the most convenient site and stuff it full. Then, I either move the entire hoard to a bigger site or find a new site where I stack the envelopes by size. Sorting by size is a valid way to handle First Class Mail since bank statements and other important things repeatedly come in larger envelopes.

Most First Class garbage comes in business size envelopes. Personal correspondence comes in smaller and every now and then odd shaped envelopes. Some are even colored depending on whether they reference some holiday.

So it is based on visual clues that I separate the likely garbage from the maybe, probably or definitely needed. One important clue I use is whether the mail even came in an envelope or not. If not then these are then subdivided into two categories: 1) Those visually scanned and/or 2) Those immediately recycled.

A picture of a waterfall with handwritten script normally designates communication from a loved one or an acquaintance that is on vacation. This can either be stored or immediately recycled. If I keep it, it is because I might need to know the next time I talk to them where they went so I can prime the small talk pump and keep running up my billable cellular network minutes. If the picture has more than one logo on it or includes typing or numerous colors of ink it is immediately recycled without prejudice.

The majority that have multiple logos or colors AND typing fall in one of the following categories, whether in envelopes or not: second, third or fourth class mail. Everything identified as not First Class Mail, except magazines or books go directly to the recycle bin. These senders try their hardest to make it impossible to recycle using plastic tape and windows on envelopes. I just cut the garbage off with a scissors and throw away the trash to recycle the paper. I make every effort not to read anything in this category despite time sensitive warnings or what have you. If these messages are red or in bigger type it is a sure identifier of the garbage and something to recycle. Almost all of it will not be that thing I should never forget and/or want to remember.

First Class Mail is a slightly different. Some is very important. Unless it has a handwritten address that identifies me correctly it joins one of the piles. When hand addressed I try to at least scan who it is from and whether or not I want to hear from them. If it is handwritten it is usually from my brother or one of my sisters. This is happening less and less as we talk on the phone and email back and forth more and more. Our family will be the downfall of the Postal System in America. I get very little of this type of mail.

Frequently this information is addressed to someone who doesn’t live where I do or shouldn’t be getting mail at my Post Office Box. Not at this address is always written across the front of these envelopes. They go back into the system where hopefully the second attempt to deliver will not be such a massive FAIL.

If anything looks the least bit “billish”… I am not the one at my address to handle it. It goes straight to the pile on the dining room table where eventually, it disappears.


Astonishingly, many things I need to and want to remember are not mail at all. Several have to do with food. As I get older others more frequently, drugs. I am sure some drugs could be responsible for me not remembering things I should never forget but we are not going down that road. Visualize Bill Clinton.


The food thing has become very important to me. Little things like where the heck is the mayonnaise?

I found it practical for those things that I constantly need to know the location of, to keep them in the same place all the time. I don’t necessarily keep the mayo with my car keys. The keys are always in the cup at the end of the counter. The mayo better be on the second shelf of the fridge unless the jar is empty. Then, the unopened jar is on the bottom shelf of the pantry. The empty jar ought to be with the recycle. From personal experience I can tell you that it is hell trying to find keys when they are on the second shelf of the fridge or in the recycle bin.

The category of things I should never forget that I really want to remember gets smaller and smaller as I get older and older. They’re fewer and fewer. Most of them are things that were said by loved ones like my mother or grandmother. My family and my beloved. Many are things about character, love and friendship. Others are just those people.


Some are things about my dog.

For DakotaDawg it is of utmost importance that I remember some things and want to remember them.

A few include:
1) She can hold it for like forever if it is raining out.
2) She is my best friend if there is a thunder storm somewhere within earshot.
.....A) She hears a lot better than I do.
.....B) She sees a lot better than I do.
.....C) She smells a lot better and more than I do or want to.
3) She is my best friend when it is not storming.
4) She eats when I eat. Simple as that.
5) She has earned two walks a day around the golf course for protecting us and being our friend. See 2 C) above.
6) She enjoys herding the kitties and does not like to be interrupted when she is in the middle of this most important task.
7) She may or may not understand English.
8) She is part of the Neighborhood Meet and Greet Dog Society. See all subsets of 2) above.


There are like a billion more things that I should never forget about my DakotaDawg. Most I want to remember. Most important of all is that it is important for me to remember what is important to her.

© 06.29.2010 steven d philbrick SR+ DakotaDawg


POSTED BY SRPLUS AT 7:20 AM